The Struggle is Real

Hello people of the world, Krissy here with another blog post. 

Depression is a real and serious issue that affects many people. It can be difficult to deal with and it can make even the simplest tasks seem impossible. I know this from personal experience and I want to share my story with you.

Last week, I was hit with a wave of depression. It was a struggle to do anything. I didn't want to work, draw, or clean. All I wanted to do was lie in my bed and do nothing. But, at the same time, I hated feeling so unproductive. I had a goal to finish my book Five Star's Princesses and I had made it so far. I was on page 137 and my goal was to reach 200. Depression got in the way and I had to put it on pause.

But, I realized that I wasn't alone in this struggle. Many people deal with depression and it can be difficult to face. However, it's important to remember that there are ways to cope and overcome it. Talking to a therapist, practicing self-care, and finding a support system are just a few ways to help manage depression.

If you or someone you know is struggling with depression, please reach out to a mental health professional or a support hotline for help. You don't have to face it alone.

Me out of the water

Depression is a serious mental illness that affects millions of people worldwide. It's often described as feeling like broken limbs, where simple tasks become overwhelming and all you want to do is stay in bed. As a mother, dealing with depression can be especially challenging, as you still have to care for your children and maintain a sense of normalcy.

My first encounter with depression was when a family member was going through a rough time. I didn't quite understand why they were acting the way they were, but as I got older, I realized how debilitating depression can be. It wasn't until I served my mission for my church that I had a deeper understanding of depression.

My mission companion had a medical case of depression and had to take medication for it. She was an amazing person, but her depression made it difficult for her to work with me. As part of our role as missionaries, we had to be sight and sound with our companion at all times, which made it challenging when she would turn off and not work with me. Eventually, it became so bad that I had to send her home, which was one of the hardest things I've had to do.

Depression is not something that can be easily understood or fixed. It's a complex illness that requires patience, compassion, and understanding. If you or someone you know is struggling with depression, don't be afraid to seek help. There are many resources available, including therapy, medication, and support groups. Remember, you're not alone, and it's okay to ask for help.

I drew her before she went home. She loved it.

I didn't understand why, but as time goes I do now. It's hard to be in that state and function like a human being. It's also like being physically sick, but it's mental. Your brain is broken and needs time to heal. I'm no doctor but from my experiences, this is what it feels like. 

For those that don't know, or I have no idea if I ever mentioned, I went through a divorce in 2020, right before COVID-19 happened, I wanted the divorce for many reasons, but the main reason is that I was in a really dark place. I didn't know who I was and knew I would kick the bucket if I stayed any longer.

In therapy, I had an experience where I looked back on the darkest times of my life and saw my past self lying on my bed and demons dancing around me. When I saw this from my present self I was shocked at how deadly I looked and wanted to help her.

Another imaginary self-saving myself from a bad situation. It helped me draw these pictures during my healing process.

Giving all of my anxiety and fears in a bottle and giving it to my savior.

This is how I see myself now, a goddess with pure faith and protection.

When I left him it took a lot of courage to seek therapy and to work through the pain I'd experienced. I'm glad that I did, for I was able to find myself again and feel happy and free. 

It's important to acknowledge that healing is not a linear process and that triggers or stressors can set us back. It's okay to not be okay sometimes and to ask for help when needed. 

For anyone who is going through a similar experience, please know that you are not alone. It's okay to seek help and to take the time you need to heal. There are resources available and people who care and want to support you.

Remember to be kind to yourself and to practice self-care. It's not an easy journey, but it's worth it. And know that there is no shame in asking for help. You deserve to live a happy and healthy life.

How I felt before the divorce.

How I felt after the divorce.

I am working on myself, writing this post has helped me to remember who I am and who I want to be, and try to be better. I can do it. You can do it. Thanks for reading, have a good day.

Link Videos With Ebb and Flow

 

Hello, people of the world. Krissy here with another post. 

    If you haven't, please check out Ebb and Flow Gamerz, link right here. I am the editor of this channel and enjoy doing their videos. It's fun and funny, and if you love Zelda like I do you'll love the latest videos we've been doing. We are doing a series of Skyward Sword, who here has played it? Is it your favorite? I have done some fan pictures from the game, and here they are.

    Do you have a favorite character from this game? I want to do more but I've been so slacking on the fan arts. I tend to do this, where I will be so on top of it, and then I crash and don't do any of it at all for some time. I do have depression and anxiety and could be part of it, but I also think it's my disorder. I have Central Auditory Processing Disorder, (a form of ADHD) and I get hyper-focus on something for a while and then just lose it. Takes me a while to get back into it.

    

    I have been watching and rewatching Hazbin Hotel, and I want to draw the characters in my style so so bad, but again...that fire isn't there I rather play video games or be with my kids. Or just something, I just have a hard time sitting down and doing it. 

    

    I'm still working on my next book Five Star Princesses, but it's also lacking, I don't know what happened, for a whole month I was doing 10 pages a week, but now...I can barely do one, it's really frustrating, I don't know why I lost it, but hopefully, after Spring Break it'll be back on track.

    Spring break is coming up and I am excited about it, my boyfriend is coming to town because he lives far away, and my kids and I (plus two of my siblings) are all going down to Bryce Canyon. It's one of my favorite canyons here in Utah, there's a lot of easy hikes, and the view is gorgeous.  My kids aren't the greatest at hiking so that will be a challenge but cannot wait to go and enjoy the red rocks. 

This is supposed to take place in Arches, one of the first paintings I've done you can obviously tell.

Events I did Last Year of 2023

 Hello, people of the world!

Last year, I did a few shows. Events. The first one was July Fourth in Tooele Utah, and it was a huge success!

I remember being so nervous about it and trying to be prepared, and I did learn a lot from it so the next time I'll be better at it. 

I found a free event in August last year and decided to jump right into it. It wasn't as good, made about $50 I think, but nothing like the first event which was $200.

Goldfish Swim School Free Event Last Year August 

Even though the last event wasn't that great, I decided to try again in August and did pay for it. There was a parking lot by an old movie theater in American Fork Utah that was having events every Saturday. So I decided to try it, good thing I just did it one Saturday because I only made like $5 bucks...and the payment I had to pay was $40, so that was not worth it. 

I honestly think they stopped doing that...at least I hope cause there was no one. No foot traffic and such. When there was someone I really tried to reel them in, mostly kids wanted to spin the wheel but didn't want to pay for it... the wheel is actually my main thing that attracts and makes money out of.

Here's the booth for that lame event.

The next event I did was in October. Eagle Mountain was giving away free spots but also asked not to sell anything. Which was disappointing but decided to do it to promote my shop. I gave away candy, vegetables, stickers, magnets, and king-size candy bars, and my wheel is what did it. When you spin it and wherever it lands it's what you take. 

AAnnndd....it was a HUGE success. Oh my goodness, there was a line, and I mean a LINE! Everyone wanted to spin to get what they wanted and it was exciting, I gave away all of my business cards, and all of my items...until it was no more than I had to take away my wheel and disappoint a lot of people because I had to put it away for I none to give. I thought I had plenty of stuff, but apparently not.

Halloween Town Eagle Mountain Utah October 2023

The last event I did last year was the Christmas Village in Eagle Mountain Utah. And it did end well, did make over $100. My toes froze, I mean literally, there was fresh snow when I arrived, and I did shovel my spot but I don't think I did a good job, nor did my four pairs of socks, help. I was there from 9 until 5, and remember how my toes just froze to death, but happy to have another success before the year ended.

Christmas Village December 2023

Now it's a new year and did a book sale in February with a friend, that was also a nice success, but I want to continue to do more through this year.

I am definitely going to Tooele Utah again for the 4th of July, but I also want to do one in Eagle Mountain in June. It's not official but I will try to sign up for that. For those who follow me, if you know of any kind of event that has successful foot traffic in Utah, please let me know. I can only do it in Utah. I enjoy selling my stuff and making my small business. Check out my website for more items.

https://www.krissyproductions.com/

Also, Check out Ebb and Flow Gamerz, I am the editor of this channel and it's super fun to watch!

I started making comics since 2005

 Hello, people of the world. 

So much has happened in my life, and it's mainly from drawing. I clean, cook, take care of my kids, and draw on my tablet all my other free time. 

    Usually, I can do one page to two pages a week, lately, it's been five a week. Wow. I don't know why that is, I have just been really excited about my next book series which is 5 Stars Princesses. 

    I have finished Sweet and Sour, now it's time for the next thing. Sweet and Sour book 3 is being edited, but here are a few pages from it. 

If you haven't gotten books 1 or 2, here they are. 

Sweet and Sour Volume 1

Sweet and Sour Volume 2

I finished my first series, Once it's published it will be official at least, I have worked on this first series since 2018. Wow, has time flown, it's already 2024 that's so crazy. Now I am working on 5 Star Princesses, my goal for this series is 5 books. Now I have much more confidence in doing it I can do it! 

I have created this story since I was 12, it was one of the first books I tried to draw in my sketchbooks in middle school. I was 12 when I started to draw anime, and 5 Star's Princesses was the first story I came up with. 

    Over the years I have re-written it over and over again. This story was starting to hurt my head. I gave up a few times cause honestly, the story itself was hard to work with. It started with the idea that the star queen was dying and gave her powers to her five children, then her sister came unexpectedly and when she saw she was dead she wanted her powers, but it wasn't much. The queen's maid Sabing sent her children down to earth and then the sister kills Sabing. Lymond and Paxtin, the two servants to the star queen, try to get the sister but she leaves. Lymond and Paxtin went to find the queen kids but didn't know where.

    There was more than that, but when I was looking at it later in my life I tried to restart it with the same idea in the beginning, and I restarted it again later in life. I have at least restarted this story with the same beginning about 4 times. And each time...I just couldn't keep going, for one I wasn't sure what this story was really about, I knew who where the characters were, the bad guy, the good guys, but...something was just missing, and I just gave up for a while on it. 

    I have tried writing it, adding more characters, and changing the story a bit here and there. For some reason I wanted to keep going on this one...but it was failing.

    Then one day, in 2022, I was running. I started running in 2020. I have been really into it since, (if you asked me ten years ago I would tell you I would never run, haha.) But anyway, during one of my runs, I was in my imagination world with the songs I was listening to, and one of the songs made me think of 5 stars and princesses. I had no idea why but I was, and for some reason...it hit me. I had a scene in my mind that made this story a whole lot different, and unique. 

    I can't share it now, but it has made me get back into it in 2022. I wrote it, sketched the characters, and the timeline, and I got excited. So I am pretty excited for this story and cannot wait to be published. 5 Star Princesses may or may not be a good name, but I am sticking to it. This story has been different since 12, now that I am 30 I am keeping the name the same. 

Here's the sketchbook clear back then.

Here's now.